no one blames c...

no one blames crazy people for being crazy. i think i'm somewhere between being crazy and being normal, where it's not good but it's still my fault. i'm just flawed, i guess. i'm not sure which i would rather be, anyway. one way you have all the priveliges of normal everyday people, but the other way you hold none of the responsibilities or expectations. um, yeah. that's all.

i made a new "lay...

i made a new "layout" for my "webpage", but freespeech wont let me upload. i have that papa roach song stuck in my head. i'm having what must be my fifth cup of tea. i am very tired.

i watched first...

i watched first love, last rites. i really liked it a lot. rent it. or buy it or steal it or something, i don't care. unless you're like into action movies and umm that type of stuff. it reminded me a lot of heather. and like...stuff. i don't know what's happening to me. i can't stop thinking of her. i can't think. i'm going to call her as soon as i think she might be awake, or wouldn't be horribly impolite to her parents and stuff.

oh yeah, ...

oh yeah, my name's jason. internet heather said so. i don't like reffering to people as 'internet _____', but if i don't it gets confusing. you can see on my friends page. she's the only one. i guess i should make some new friends. i'm not all that good at that though. and friends to me don't seem like things that should just be made. like you go out to the store and buy them or something. i don't know. i'm rambling.

whenever peo...

whenever people present their hand to me in any way i never know what to do. i'm totally clueless. i normally just give them my hand and let them do whatever the feel like with it. to me that would be better than pretending to know what to do.

i don'...

i don't want to ever go to sleep. 'cause then i'll wake up. and i'm afraid of what things will be like when i wake up. but i don't want to be awake either. waiting for change is much to tedious. i don't know what i want. i don't want any of this. i want to be with heather. that's all.

i rented do...

i rented dogma and this movie with the guy who plays phoebe's brother from friends. 'first love, last rites,' or something. heather has not called me back yet. she better or i'm going to have to spend the rest of the night quietly sobbing in the hall closet. wont that be pathetic.